Bill Bolin was a former Homestuck Music Team member who had made many songs that were featured in the flash pages of the comic. However, he left around early 2010, and all of his music was taken down and replaced with new songs (this is one of the main reasons for Volume 5 being so large, apparently). Here’s a whole lot of his music! Some pieces are certainly better than others; overall, I think his music is nice, but nowhere near the current levels of the Music Team.
(more later. or you can just go to my channel from these videos and watch the rest!)
Edit: Bill Bolin had these videos removed from youtube, which also caused my account to be deleted. This is probably pretty bad but I’m not angry. I will leave this up as a historic note though.
My cousin and I were back-and-forth writing this while in the car going on a trip one day my 8th grade year (2009). italics is my cousin. You can see how this story quickly devolved into a fight thread.
By B.A Baker and Grace
One day, a guy walked into a saloon. There were lots of drunken people and old dead dudes. This guy, named Mordecai, didn’t like old people, so he threw a grenade at the bartender, and it exploded.
The bartender died. It was not sad, because we got free beer (or Ben did) So we walked out then out of nowhere….
The Guy saw Grace and threw a grenade at her.
And she ran then pushed Ben in front of her
Then we died. Including the guy.
And the Cold War was over
Because everybody was dead, Mr. Patch, a factory worker at the bagel food company, took over the world. He renamed himself Emperor-King Almighty of the Universe and Everything in It Fordo.
Then Ben killed him and Grace was vice emperor
But Grace was dead so she became the Zombie Lordess and invaded the sun with her Navy of Undead.
She won and became the most feared person in the Underworld.
Except for Mr. Patch,. Who worked with the guy with the grenades named Mordecai to destroy Grace.
Then she came back to life because she was already dead. Then the guy thatwas with Ben killed Ben and he was a prisoner in her underworld fortress.
Ben escaped and went underground to form a resistance against the Zombie Empire.
But it was not that easy to escape, for his legs were cut off. Then Grace caught up with him.
Ben killed Grace forever
That’s bull crap. Grace cut off his arm and left.
Ben put his arm back on and followed.
Grace knew he was following and tricked him to the dungeon.
When Ben got to the dungeon, he used his beat-control powers and freed all the prisoners with the dungeon dragon. Now the resistance had enough people to defeat Grace.
…He wished. But Grace’s army was too strong
But the dragon sacrificed himself and destroyed the army, allowing the resistance to get to the Throne Room.
Until Grace made a movie.
Yes, she made Jackbutt.
The resistance went in the theater and watched Jackbutt
And then Jackbutt crew took them down when they laughed
So everybody died except Grace.
Not really jerk!
One day in English class, we were discussing the Medieval period and how it ended around 1500 (this was not actually very correct, as it ended in many places as early as the 1300s), and my teacher was joking about how it didn’t end at exactly 1500, with everyone just turning into civilized people. So I decided to make a story about it.
This was written my seventh grade year, around March or so 2008. At the time I was obsessed with Fire Emblem and we were studying English mythology (especially King Arthur). You can tell from this story.
By B.A. Baker
It was the year 1472. The Renaissance was coming in 28 years, and the barbarians would be defeated- the people civilized. Most people loved it, because the wars would be over. But not King Pellais. He only had 28 years until he had to become civilized! So he gathered all of his knights one day. “Wooo!” he said, meaning that he wanted to take over the Byzantine Empire before he had to be civilized and help Galileo and become Catholic or Church of England. So he sent his finest knight, Sir Orthodox, and his squire at arms, Sir Ramzy. They took a platoon and conquered England. Then France. Then Prussia. Then Holy Rome. Then Portugal. Then so many sentences started with then that the dark druid Matanong. The jungle. His shamans out to kill the platoon, but back in time after England was conquered. The shamans appeared in London where Sir Alfred was left to govern. Alfred was a good governor, but his commanding army was way less than stellar. He sent out 3 men, but they couldn’t stop getting attacked. The shamans’ attack animations were so long that by player phase, Alfred had to use his light magic and got killed because dark magic hits light sages. The rest of the men gave up. Later, Sir Vitamin got news of Sir Alfred’s downfall, and instead of marching onto France, he caused a paradox and turned, sailing to Scotland, where the shamans were gathered. Vitamin’s men were deserters and left camp to go to Libya and surf in their spinoff book trilogy. So Vitamin was alone in dangerous Scotland, with shamans coming to his camp. He took 3 5-Hour Energies and died.
27 years passed. Sir Orthodox had led his men to Luffy Island, which was right next to Istanb- er, Constantinople, the Byzantine Empire’s capital.Sadly, 4kids Entertainment censored his army, changing his voice to Ash Ketchum’s, and caused his army to to invade and instead have a friendship speech. Sir Ramzy deserted the army and took over Constantinople, calling his new kingdom “Turkey” after his favorite food. He was later overthrown and sent to Libya to be a priest, a special priest that is now known as a lifeguard. The shamans that Vitamin killed himself over actually revolted against Matanong, killing him and starting the Democratic Party. They were burned at the stake for paganism, though. It was found later that one druid escaped and changed his name to that of President Barack Obama [Remember that this was written in spring 2008, meaning he had not yet even won the nomination for the Democratic Party!] King Arthur, not pleased with Mordred’s naughtiness, grounded the scoundrel for a week, and then continued his hobby of pulling swords out of random rocks. Swamp Nuggets cameoed in this short stored, then got pummeled in the eyebrows, and a javelin stabbed his hair. Doctors barely kept him alive (dumb doctors can’t handle euphoria right!), and Swamp Nuggets had a boo-boo forever. Or at least until someone sprayed him with mace so he fell off a mountain and was hit back up, probably with a mace. Then he died. Sir Alfred’s head was morphed and put on Hitler’s face to become Dr. Phil, an espionage Israelian Ninja… in shining armor. Sir Carnage kept mostly to himself. William Harrison died shortly after becoming president, due to Sir Orthodox’s actions in his non-censored life, and it affected everyone in America. For King Pellais, however…
The clock turned midnight- it was 1500. King Pellais’s castle was turned into Spain, and King Louis/Henry/William/Generic King Name/Chris of England took his country over so that Portugal could keep spending billions of dubloons on sea exploration. It failed, and King Pellais took over the universe. The end.
I have uploaded quite a few new videos to my Youtube Channel! Tons of old Homestuck music from Bill Bolin, and some new stuff. I will post some of them here every few days (aka every time I remember to do it).l
There has been a lack of posts lately, so, as I have nothing better to do, here is some wonderful and enlightening filler! So in no particular order, here are my top 25 games of all time! P.S. when there are direct sequels, such as Bioshock 1/2 and Portal 1/2, I will only list my favorite.
1. The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
2. Fallout 3
3. Paper Mario
4. Half Life 2
5. Portal 2
7. LA Noire
8. Pokemon Ruby/Sapphire
10. Banjo Tooie
11.The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
12. Super Smash Bros. Brawl
13. Super Mario Galaxy 2
14. Halo 3
15. Super Mario World
16. Metal Gear Solid 4
17. Uncharted 2
18. Professor Layton and the Curious Village
19. Mother 3
20. Mass Effect 2
21. The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
22. Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando
23. Sly 2: Band of Thieves
24. Alan Wake
25. Soul Calibur IV
Yay! Finished! I probably forgot like 12 different games, but too bad, deal with it! Hope you enjoyed this most pointless of all filler posts!
This game enrages me. It’s randomly generated so the game plays almost entirely on luck, and the physics are really poor so it’s really hard to go up and down when you need to. The hit box on the helicopter is way too big; many times I’ve “hit” a wall when I totally actually did avoid it, and the whole game is just overly simplistic and should be really boring.
But I play it anyway. I have no idea what is up with this game, but it’s so addicting. On some occasions, I’ve actually played it 20, 30 times in a row, and I’m not even good at it. There’s no other “casual” game that I’ve ever played that has matched my obsession with Helicopter, barring the Xbox Live Indie Game Baby Maker Xtreme. How can such a dumb and simple game interest me so much?
I have no idea, but one thing is for certain; the Super Mario Bros. version of Helicopter sucks really bad, and I DON’T like to play it, either. 😛