The Evolution Revolution

Archive for the category “First Impressions”

Wii U Twitter Posts

Here is what I posted while I waited for 9 hours for the Wii U. (reverse order)



Me really bored waiting for the Wii U

My ticket. Notice the #1. I earned that. 8|

This is the impromptu and very unprofessional video I made of me unboxing my Wii U with my little brother. WordPress won’t upload .3gp, and my Youtube was taken down, as you may recall, so all I can do is post the link.

Homestuck Marching Band Show (UPDATE)

This is a powerpoint that I have made for the concept of a Homestuck Marching Band Show! Share this with everyone! I will repost this as many times as I possibly can because this must become a reality!

I am basically reposting this.

Homestuck Marching Show

This is a powerpoint that I have made for the concept of a Homestuck Marching Band Show! Share this with everyone! I will repost this as many times as I possibly can because this must become a reality!

First Impressions: Duke Nukem Forever

A quick disclaimer before I get started; no I did not pay full price for this game; it was 10$, and no, I did not buy it thinking it would be a good game. Now that that’s out of the way, lets talk about the game, and whether it is REALLY the abomination to video gaming that I have been lead to believe.

The game starts in a bathroom with Duke, you probably could’ve guessed, standing in front of a urinal with this direction superimposed over the game screen; “Hold RT to piss”. Sure enough, a stream of what I can assume is lemonade comes streaming out of Duke’s crotch. Whelp, this sure is a fantastic way to start out a game. After Mr Nukem is done relieving himself I take a stroll around the bathroom, turning on showers and doing much more pissing, and then exit into a locker room. In the center of the room is a whiteboard with a battle plan on it, labeled “Operation Cock Block”. I’ll tell you now, the jokes I have heard in my first several hours of gameplay have not advanced farther than the standard penis joke. After drawing a crudely illustrated penis on the white board, to which the soldier standing by me referred to as “a brilliant plan”, I ran through some hallways, I punched stuff, and then I went up an elevator. This is where the first really interesting thing happens.

I am lifted into a football arena with a huge monster…uhm…alien….cyclops….thing. I pick up a rocket launcher which, to add a layer of complex, intelligent humor to the game, had 69 rockets, and begin my assault. I shoot, I dodge, I pick up more ammo, I repeat, until this thing is dead. Duke jumps on his head, pulls out a random hose that I can only assume is there to have something to pull out, and then kicks the monster’s eye through the field goa-BUT WAIT! In a Mario Bros 2 style plot twist, the whole battle was a drea..urm, I mean, a video game! Duke sits in controller in hand and two scantily clad women stand up from shining his shoes. After recovering from that staggering blow of a plot twist, I asked myself this; “Was that really that bad?”.

Sure the gunplay was stale, sure the dialog was probably written by the person who writes Gears of Wars ambient dialog after a terrible drinking binge, but does that detract from the fact that it is a fairly fun game? I say no. Now this may be because I am a connoisseur of terrible media, as I would and have willingly hours playing Earth Defense Force and watching the Super Mario Bros Super Show, but the three or four hours I have spent playing Duke Nukem Forever have been pretty damn fun! I mean, it’s not the same sort of rewarding fun as Bioshock or Mass Effect, but the sort of cheap, hilarious fun as watching Catwoman with a couple of friends. You definitely shouldn’t buy it over Skyrim or Uncharted 3, but for 10$ is a fine replacement for Earth Defense Force as the Superman IV of your game collection.

The Rapture Part 2!



Also starring the ghost of Alec Guiness.

Game 014- Street Fighter Alpha 3 Upper

Yes, this is another GBA port of a console fighting game. But this is actually different.

As you can see, the entire roster isn’t here, but this is still huge for GBA!
As you can see, the sprites aren’t reduced in size too much, just the level of the SNES Street Fighter Alpha 2 (which may be played through at a later date). The controls, lacking 2 buttons, remove the regular punch and kicks, only using the heavy and light attacks. That makes the gameplay much like the regular game.
Thankfully, this banter is much greater than Guilty Gear X Advance’s.
Yah, died.
Dude even on GBA I culd pull off a combo!
Hahaha get the refrence? Hahaha….ha.
Same exact guy…
So overall, this game is pretty great, in GBA terms. But like Guilty Gear, there’s a PSP version that is better than arcade perfect. But without that, this is the best Street Fighter Alpha game on any Nintendo system.

Screenshot gallery:


Belated Holiday Gift

Guess what? I’m about to upload all of the fighting game articles that I had nearly done, but never finished! Which is like 5 articles. Check back every day until Wednesday.

Game 013- Tekken 2 (NES Pirate)

Game 012- Star Wars (Namco)


So I thought this would be simply a port of the GB Star Wars. I wish it was…


lol nice cutting out Obi-Wan

So they could have just told us that we needed to find R2, but whatever.

Okay, I quit. It’s just a regular platformer, you can’t even do anything but jump! And the enemies move around in such weird ways that it’s nearly impossible to make any progress without getting about 2 game overs!

Game 011- Shaq-Fu (GB)

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